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Editor in Chief: Eshaan Joshi
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📍 the oft-forgotten F-tower | Pronouns: she/her
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Staffwriter

Communications, 2038 (master’s program)

Bio

I’m a hard-nosed student journalist. I spend my time cutting through the lies and lying on the Cut.

Fun Fact

I dislike poetry.

Previous Work

October 29, 1929: "Block Tuesday" Leaves Freshmen Destitute

At Carnegie Mellon University, the end of the 1920s saw unprecedented financial ruin for many first-year students. The meal-block economy had crescendoed throughout the decade, with blocks selling for a whopping 50% of their original worth. Unfortunately, this lucrative exchange could not last forever. The block market imploded, wiping out …

Evolution of Hetero Sapiens

Up until the 1960s, the student body of Carnegie Mellon University consisted solely of gay men. Passionate academic rivalries and long nights in the lab together fostered a thriving homosexual population at CMU. De Fer ran out of iced coffee by 8:03 every morning, and the CMU Philharmonic played nothing …

76-101 Assignment 1. Due Friday!


New Study Finds Vaccines Cause CMU Students

Many parents have expressed concerns about the possible long-term complications of vaccinating their children. However, leading scientists recently discovered a positive relationship between childhood immunization and readiness for Carnegie Mellon University.

SCS freshman Lily Anderson received the measles-mumps rubella vaccine at age three. By age four, her parents had …

If Celsius doesn't work, maybe this can fix me.