Paid for by: Andrew Carnegie himself. We think.
KGB Presents: readme
Editor-in-Chief: Eshaan Joshi
All the news unfit to print!
Pitch meetings Sat 5:00 pm, DH-1211
Silhouettes of a man with a CRT screen for a head and another man pointing guns at each other on Pausch bridge. It's captioned "explore Human-Computer Interaction at CMU."
A word search which, when completed, appears strangely similar to a certain four-panel comic.

10 Reasons readme is better than The Tartan

1) Better at news

Unlike The Tartan, which operates on the ideas that journalism should be "fair" and "unbiased", readme is the only campus news source that includes fun quips interesting comments, and other eccentricities.

2) Better words

Find me a single example of the Tartan using the word "eccentricites". You can't. We're simply better.

3) Lack of a sports section

Considering how much we here at Carnegie Mellon dislike sports, atheltics, and the general existence of non­academic endeavours, readme stays true to the original vision of Carnegie Mellon by ignoring any and all sports …

A Psychosocial Approach to Game-Theoretic Analysis of Rock Paper Scissors

1. Introduction

Rock paper scissors, also known as scissors paper rock, and rarely ever referred to as paper rock scissors, is a game typically played between two people, where one match of rock paper scissors (RPS) consists of both players throwing out a hand gesture at the same time after a brief countdown. These hand gestures represent a rock, paper, or a pair of scissors, respectively (some variants also allow for other objects, such as guns. However, we will only be considering the usage of actual guns to gain a tactical advantage). Rock beats scissors by denting them, scissors beats …

An image captioned "Scotty Game / Rules: don't look at this Scotty dog!". The image is of a Scotty dog which contains the text "Game Over."
A coupon offering "1 Free Advice" from Grey's Wingman Service (circa 2022).