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Rock Buddy

Rock Buddy

he/him

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chem, 2029

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Read Me's Recipes from Last Night

The SCS:
• One Monster Energy Ultra White
• One Vanilla Yoplait
• Two shots of Raspberry Vodka

The Tepper:
• One shot of Blue Diamond
• One shot of Coffee Liqueur
• Coke Served with a silver spoon.

The “White Boy speaking a little Espanol”:
• A shot of tequila with a depressed lime and salt spilled into the drink
• “Arriba, abajo, acentro, adentro”

The Wedding Crasher:
• Four shots of Tequila
• Two shots of Bailey’s
• Pepsi and Milk to Taste
• Four regrettable text messages

The Amnesty Call:
• Two …

Chemger Games winners threaten double suicide, sequels cancelled

It has been an action-packed day for the Chemger Games. Contestants from every corner of campus have embarked on the perilous journey to reach the Mellon Institute, with many dying from exhaustion before ever reaching the godforsaken building. Of those who remained, drama was omnipresent. Who could forget the unforgettable forced laser cutting perpetrated by the two members of the Donner house, or the various chemical burns perpetrated by Mudge? Certainly not the individuals from E Tower, who retaliated with an attempted poisoning with an unlabeled powder that ended up being table salt. But the most dramatic part was when …