Benner Rogers

By Benner Rogers • Vol 4, Issue 2 • Sept. 10, 2025

Archeologists in northern Greece have recently unearthed a seemingly comedy-themed manuscript dating back to the 6th century. Found during the excavation of the famed Skibo monastery, the manuscript was titled PreachMe and included articles poking fun at everything from strange-looking icons to priest pet peeves. PreachMe appears to have been hand copied at Skibo before being circulated between various other Byzantine monasteries. No other surviving copies have been found. Although most of the manuscript is too damaged to be read, a brief excerpt of the article “The Siege of Skibo” has been translated below:

…the invading Horde …

By Benner Rogers • Vol 4, Issue 2 • Sept. 10, 2025

A routine safety inspection of the steam tunnels beneath Carnegie Mellon University went awry when an unexpected wall collapse revealed the heart of a still living ancient empire. When FMS workers attempted to survey the oldest section of CMU’s steam tunnels last Sunday, they accidentally triggered a minor sinkhole. The workers escaped unharmed; however a large section of wall and flooring collapsed to reveal a previously unknown cave tunnel. The tunnel leads into a complex underground network of passages and natural caverns full of primeval artifacts completely untouched by time. The most shocking part? People were still living there.

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By Benner Rogers & Johnny Truant • Vol 3, Issue 7 • April 2, 2025

When Spring Carnival Committee began a routine structural check on what seemed to be an ordinary one-story booth, it certainly never expected to discover a scientific mystery that would stump even the greatest minds CMU has to offer. Yet that’s exactly what happened when SCC checked the booth built by Zampanò’s Literature club. During the structural check, it was discovered that the booth was a quarter inch bigger on the inside when compared to the outside.

ZLC’s booth, themed after the hit documentary The Navidson Record, seemed laughably simple upon first glance. The walls are painted pitch black and …