Student amazed by foreign culture after study abroad in Philadelphia • Dreamworks newest IP revealed: "How to train your LLM" • Classic 90s songs we've all forgotten: 1. I Just Got An Abortion (And It Felt So Good) • Biology department recommends students engineer another pandemic for finals reprieve, extra credit offered • King Solomon Attempts to divide up twins, mother requests they're both cut in half • Gregor Samsa wakes, horrified, to find himself transformed into Tepper student • “I'm such a freak. If anyone saw my search history I’d be on a watchlist,” says man who just looks up vanilla porn • All of Science wrong. Oops • CMU linguistics department finishes 70 year project to translate ancient Egyptian porno • How to make sure the divorce is YOUR fault, a guide for teens • I walked to the sky and all I got was this lousy T-shirt • "1929 will be my year" says man who invested all his money into Wall Street • CMU rules military service ineligible for Experiential Learning • Loving Couple LARP as bitter, nearly-separated divorcees • Deer given proper therapy and antidepressants significantly less likely to freeze in front of cars • What linear algebra can teach you about your parent’s sex lives • Report: Voices in your head usually correct, studies show • Internship interviews now include mandatory duel to the death • My Military Industrial Complex could totally blow up your Military Industrial Complex • Novel studies demonstrate that drinking water and eating food are good for you, pulling all nighters and shotgunning Celsius are bad • Admin continues to insist that you can't spell anything else with the letters C, M, and U • Spinning benches found to be migratory where do they go? • “It’s actually a metaphor for being reeeaaalllly hungry.” author, on cannibalism • Carnegie Mellon color no longer the concept of plaid • Kilties go on strike, now only wear normal hats • Lube offered for Wean holes • CMU football wins ten consecutive Heismans, CMU students still not going to games • Coca Cola rebrands to Methamphina Cola, claims no ingredient changes • Lawmakers determine abortion to be legal only when Mercury is in retrograde • i have two calculators in my backpack and im ashamed • Demolition Company breaks up married couple • To ease staffing troubles, Philosophy Department begins tying professors to trolley tracks • Hilbert Hotel relocated to Doherty • Tartan slanders innocent billionaire, more at 11 • Man I sure hope no one rejects this headline • American Study-Abroad Program expands school shootings worldwide • 3D Printer Crushed by Anvil, Now Regular Printer • Amid mental health crisis, Google image searches for “scary werewolf” outnumber searches for “silly dog” • Chartwells pilots innovative Sustenance-as-a-Service model • 98304 "How to get through red tape" StuCo finally confirmed after years long bureaucratic battle with CMU • Student amazed by foreign culture after study abroad in Philadelphia • Dreamworks newest IP revealed: "How to train your LLM". • Classic 90s songs we've all forgotten: 1. I Just Got An Abortion (And It Felt So Good) • Biology department recommends students engineer another pandemic for finals reprieve, extra credit offered • King Solomon Attempts to divide up twins, mother requests they're both cut in half. • Gregor Samsa wakes, horrified, to find himself transformed into Tepper student • “I'm such a freak. If anyone saw my search history I’d be on a watchlist,” says man who just looks up vanilla porn. • All of Science wrong. Oops. • CMU linguistics department finishes 70 year project to translate ancient Egyptian porno • How to make sure the divorce is YOUR fault, a guide for teens • I walked to the sky and all I got was this lousy T-shirt • "1929 will be my year" says man who invested all his money into Wall Street. • CMU rules military service ineligible for Experiential Learning. • Loving Couple LARP as bitter, nearly-separated divorcees • Deer given proper therapy and antidepressants significantly less likely to freeze in front of cars. • What linear algebra can teach you about your parent’s sex lives. • Report: Voices in your head usually correct, studies show. • Internship interviews now include mandatory duel to the death • My Military Industrial Complex could totally blow up your Military Industrial Complex • Novel studies demonstrate that drinking water and eating food are good for you, pulling all nighters and shotgunning Celsius are bad. • Admin continues to insist that you can't spell anything else with the letters C, M, and U. • Spinning benches found to be migratory where do they go? • “It’s actually a metaphor for being reeeaaalllly hungry.” author, on cannibalism • Carnegie Mellon color no longer the concept of plaid • Kilties go on strike, now only wear normal hats • Lube offered for Wean holes. • CMU football wins ten consecutive Heismans, CMU students still not going to games. • Coca Cola rebrands to Methamphina Cola, claims no ingredient changes. • Lawmakers determine abortion to be legal only when Mercury is in retrograde • i have two calculators in my backpack and im ashamed. • Demolition Company breaks up married couple. • To ease staffing troubles, Philosophy Department begins tying professors to trolley tracks. • Hilbert Hotel relocated to Doherty • Tartan slanders innocent billionaire, more at 11. • Man I sure hope no one rejects this headline. • American Study-Abroad Program expands school shootings worldwide. • 3D Printer Crushed by Anvil, Now Regular Printer • Amid mental health crisis, Google image searches for “scary werewolf” outnumber searches for “silly dog” • Chartwells pilots innovative Sustenance-as-a-Service model. • 98304 "How to get through red tape" StuCo finally confirmed after years long bureaucratic battle with CMU
![[TODO]](/media/vol3/issue6/images/neighbors_jdyMuef.png)
