China expresses concerns over working conditions in CFA • CMU students take Pitt finals: “It’s nice to be good at something” • "It's not imposter syndrome, we did admit you as a mistake" admissions office admits • World Peace finally achieved after man starts Israel-Palestine argument in comments of a cat video • CMU endorses homelessness as a viable solution to rising competition in on-campus housing • My Professor Had One Comment After Viewing My Final Project: “This Sucks” • README Purchases Scottish Terrier Mascot • OPINION: I want everyone to be happy, except my favorite musicians • Internship interviews now include mandatory duel to the death • Carnegie Mellon police to be given tank to deal with unruly freshmen • Hillman very angry to discover nobody knows which building is his • Paddington 2 makes Citizen Kane look like Paddington 1 • Mrs. Claus revealed to actually be Amy Schumer • Californians Sigh in Relief as CMU Students Return to Campus • Carnegie Mellon color no longer the concept of plaid • Admin continues to insist that you can't spell anything else with the letters C, M, and U • Young men increasingly feeling that having a Borat impression counts as a personality Report • How to make sure the divorce is YOUR fault, a guide for teens • Carnegie Mellon administration to consider using Booths as freshman housing for 2025 • SCS opens research problem into computational complexity of hitting N birds with 1 stone • Student spends 7 hours working up the courage to make a phone call, recipient doesn't answer • Dreamworks newest IP revealed: "How to train your LLM" • Student uses AI to write suicide note, gets posthumous AIV • “I have no way of knowing”, says person who could very easily look it up • Reindeer waste on Epstein Island raises concerns • CMU rules military service ineligible for Experiential Learning • Professor Iliano Cervesato applies for an RA position in E-Tower following Carnegie Cup Cheating Allegations • My Military Industrial Complex could totally blow up your Military Industrial Complex • Amid mental health crisis, Google image searches for “scary werewolf” outnumber searches for “silly dog” • Wildlife conservation group takes "CMU English Major" off of endangered species list following recordsetting 7 students enrolled • Oops! All Eugenics! Student accidentally argues for eugenics during ethics class for seventeenth time this week • "I had no clue he was gay," Leonardo DaVinci's third apprentice twink claims • CIT student's "new kicks" deemed "too swag" by the administration • Environmentally conscious student group suggests switching to sustainable walkby shootings • Noah complains that God's 'gone woke' after Ark flooded • Reviewing Craig, Creg, and Craigë’s lacrosse coach Jon, his second cousin Gary, and Gary’s dog Bubbles, fish Buddy, and cat Cat • The nutritional benefits of eating this newspaper • Everyone still remembers that time you pulled several times on a push door. Everyone • CMU students surprised to find out nobody cares how little they slept • Student amazed by foreign culture after study abroad in Philadelphia • China expresses concerns over working conditions in CFA • CMU students take Pitt finals: “It’s nice to be good at something”. • "It's not imposter syndrome, we did admit you as a mistake" admissions office admits • World Peace finally achieved after man starts Israel-Palestine argument in comments of a cat video. • CMU endorses homelessness as a viable solution to rising competition in on-campus housing • My Professor Had One Comment After Viewing My Final Project: “This Sucks” • README Purchases Scottish Terrier Mascot. • OPINION: I want everyone to be happy, except my favorite musicians • Internship interviews now include mandatory duel to the death • Carnegie Mellon police to be given tank to deal with unruly freshmen. • Hillman very angry to discover nobody knows which building is his • Paddington 2 makes Citizen Kane look like Paddington 1. • Mrs. Claus revealed to actually be Amy Schumer • Californians Sigh in Relief as CMU Students Return to Campus. • Carnegie Mellon color no longer the concept of plaid • Admin continues to insist that you can't spell anything else with the letters C, M, and U. • Young men increasingly feeling that having a Borat impression counts as a personality Report • How to make sure the divorce is YOUR fault, a guide for teens • Carnegie Mellon administration to consider using Booths as freshman housing for 2025 • SCS opens research problem into computational complexity of hitting N birds with 1 stone • Student spends 7 hours working up the courage to make a phone call, recipient doesn't answer • Dreamworks newest IP revealed: "How to train your LLM". • Student uses AI to write suicide note, gets posthumous AIV • “I have no way of knowing”, says person who could very easily look it up • Reindeer waste on Epstein Island raises concerns. • CMU rules military service ineligible for Experiential Learning. • Professor Iliano Cervesato applies for an RA position in E-Tower following Carnegie Cup Cheating Allegations. • My Military Industrial Complex could totally blow up your Military Industrial Complex • Amid mental health crisis, Google image searches for “scary werewolf” outnumber searches for “silly dog” • Wildlife conservation group takes "CMU English Major" off of endangered species list following recordsetting 7 students enrolled • Oops! All Eugenics! Student accidentally argues for eugenics during ethics class for seventeenth time this week • "I had no clue he was gay," Leonardo DaVinci's third apprentice twink claims. • CIT student's "new kicks" deemed "too swag" by the administration • Environmentally conscious student group suggests switching to sustainable walkby shootings • Noah complains that God's 'gone woke' after Ark flooded. • Reviewing Craig, Creg, and Craigë’s lacrosse coach Jon, his second cousin Gary, and Gary’s dog Bubbles, fish Buddy, and cat Cat • The nutritional benefits of eating this newspaper • Everyone still remembers that time you pulled several times on a push door. Everyone. • CMU students surprised to find out nobody cares how little they slept • Student amazed by foreign culture after study abroad in Philadelphia
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Last Monday CIA forces entered Guatemala City to launch a week-long attack on the Guatemalan government, culminating in the ousting of President Bernardo Arévalo and the instatement of an authoritarian military dictatorship. According to leaked documents found in Stever basement, the campaign was a joint operation between CIA Buggy and …
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