House Plant
Staffwriter
Chemical Engineering, 2029
Bio
House Plant was bought by your mom and placed in direct sunlight yesterday. She's already dehydrated. Unlike Pinocchio, she wishes she wasn't real, and indulges in escapism via investigative journalism.
Fun Fact
Though not the same as Planty the Potted Plant, they did debate together in high school.
Previous Work
Researchers discover brief existence of Marnegie Cellon
Scientists have been studying unusual patterns of molecules in space for decades now, which tend to be artifacts of well-known universal phenomena, like supernovas.
However, one of the latest studies of these molecular “fingerprints” has yielded a result far more surprising than anyone could have ever imagined: A specific …
Fruity Take on CMU Housing
Back when Welch's was just a grape juice company, Andrew Carnegie was their biggest fan. In fact, in 1905, he built the beloved Welch House in the company's honor (and for a very generous donation) similarly to the Giant Eagle Auditorium or the Trojan Center for the Performing Arts.
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