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Alan Joseph
Staffwriter
LEFT_EMTPY
Bio
Unknowable and mysterious.
Latest
Degree of CMU alum posthumously revoked after 15-122 whiteboard found in steam tunnels
Last Thursday, a trio of students attempting to raid the famed steam tunnels under Margaret Morrison Hall for treasure were caught by CMU police. While their possessions were being confiscated, however, CMUPD came across a far more disturbing secret. Dusting off the asbestos powder covering its surface, police officers were intrigued to discover what appeared to be a small whiteboard containing an answer to a programming assignment.
After closer inspection, the homework problems were determined to be from the 15-122 class, Principles of Imperative Computation. Fearing the horrific consequences of what was to come, CMUPD immediately declared a state …