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Editor in Chief: Eshaan Joshi
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Overheard at CMU



Jan. 19

inside me, there is a wolf.... woof... woof WOOF WOOF WOOF BARK BARK WOOF YPYIP AWOOOOOO WOOF WOOF WOOF ARHGHGHGHHGHGHG


Jan. 22

"I can get a white lie shirt with 'my cousin never jacked off a salmon on accident" on the back"

"That's so messed up. My cousin did it on purpose."

"Yeah my cousin did it to a tuna"

"You guys are disgusting. My tuna jacked off my cousin"


Jan. 24

"One of my favorite hobbies is going to punk shows. I linger near the mosh pit, and wait for someone to walk by in a band Tshirt. I drill them with questions about the band, so niche and trivial they're bound not to know. Once they're insecure, I tell them they're fake punks. The stress is getting to them. There's only one way they can prove they're punk, I say. The most subversive thing you can do in this capitalistic society: scream your social security number from the stage. Determined to prove their creds as a rebellious working class youth, they do it every time. Then I open a bunch of credit cards in their name and buy cocaine."