Last night readMe’s very own chief editor Eshaan Joshi was extradited by the Trudeau administration under several counts of insurance fraud. It was found that for the past three years he has been claiming several life insurance policies from readMe staff along with abusing Canada's generous healthcare policy.
The police investigation is still ongoing as to whether he claimed the insurance, but from what is known it seems there are several clauses in readMe’s employment contract written in white font. One of these makes Eshaan the claimant of the signer’s life insurance. It seems that this then led him to murder a bunch of the members to claim the money.
His known murders were meant to seem like natural causes in order to not raise suspicion. So far we only know the details of a couple murders. _ was drugged with Fentanyl and had an overdose faked. was killed in an arranged drunk driving incident. slipped on an intentionally placed banana peel in front of a table saw. __ had their bathwater swapped with fluoroantimonic acid. was shot 14 times in the chest. _____ had their major swapped to computer science. All of these natural-seeming deaths were overlooked by the CMU PD when they happened.
This is creating legal troubles for him now as all of the grieving families have banded together to, in legal terms, “sue the everloving shit out of him”. He also faces criminal charges for his life insurance fraud.
He also took full advantage of Canada’s healthcare policies by embedding rusty nails into the keyboards of the readMe writers. He allegedly had an extreme free-healthcare fetish, so he would masturbate to the free hospital bills of the writers.
Eshaan has declined to be interviewed.
Currently for all of his crimes Eshaan is facing four counts of capital punishment, with a hearing scheduled in two months. However, the courts are uncertain about this sentence due to worries that he may attempt to claim his own life insurance posthumously.
