Elliot Rice
Staffwriter
CIT Undeclaired, 2029
Bio
my name is Elliot rice and I am me. I am Elliot rice. He is also Elliot rice. This is why I am Elliot rice. My hands are absolutely covered in skin. I enjoy using that skin to accomplish various tasks throughout my life.
Fun Fact
From Salem, Oregon but like I live in Pittsburgh because obviously
Previous Work
Hamburg Hall to be renamed Cheeseburg Hall
After much debate, David P. Bennett, the Vice President for University Advancement at CMU has officially made the decision to rename Hamburg Hall to Cheeseburg Hall. Designed in 1915, Cheeseburg Hall originally served as the headquarters for the U.S. Bureau of Mines; however, in 1984, the building was purchased by Carnegie Mellon for use by the Heinz College of Information Systems and Public Policy and renamed to Hamburg Hall. This may have seemed like an acceptable name at first, but a mere 41 years later it has become clear that Cheeseburg Hall is much more fitting. ReadMe conducted street interviews on several CMU students, gauging the effect of the new name. The first question we asked was “What’s the first word you think of when I say the word Hamburg?” Most students responded with the word “hamburger,” and everyone else immediately changed their answer to “hamburger” after being presented with the fact that this was the home of Heinz College. Next, we asked “Are hamburgers better with cheese?” All but one student with very bad taste in food answered affirmatively. As evidenced by this short interview, whoever named Hamburg Hall had hamburgers on their mind and a very unpopular opinion on what type of burger deserved to have a building named after it. Clearly, Vice President Bennett agreed when he approved the new name in a 1-0 vote Monday morning. All signs and plaques displaying the building’s current name will be replaced by the end of spring semester, ensuring that the Class of 2030+ will only ever have the best type of burger on the mind.