People you don't want to be alone in a booth with
A serial killer
A cereal killer (if you’re a box of Froot Loops®)
A cobra (SigEp is really putting in the work)
An IRS agent (who actually pays their taxes?)
A Jehovah’s Witness (now they have a way to solicit on-campus)
That guy who watches me through my window while I sleep
An older brother (the bane of many people’s [mine included] existences)
A United Airlines staff member (if Carnival is overfilled)
A human trafficker (if, unlike me, you have strength or sex appeal)
Your stalker
A smooth criminal
That friendly guy you know whose name you feel guilty for not knowing
A Boeing exec (if you're a Boeing whistleblower)
A Mario character (if you're a Boeing, or any company, exec)
Shou Tucker (if you have a dog)
John Wilkes Booth (if you have a beard and top-hat)
Medusa (if you somehow don't struggle to make eye contact with people)
A WZ-120 - Type 59 - tank (COMMENT REDACTED BY THE CCP)
SCP-682
Rabbit of Caerbannog (if you seek the Holy Grail)
Creeper (aww man)
A SCS Student (leading cause of phantosmia in the United States)