CMU-specific Travel Advisory
With spring break rapidly approaching, CMU has put out a travel advisory against countries that are deemed “unsafe for Tartans”. If you have booked a trip to any of these countries, please reconsider your plans.
Ukraine
Why did you even book a flight to Kyiv?
Spain
If you are going to España over break, please do not come back with an accent. You did not gain your “authentic” accent in 7 days, and we all hate you. No one cares that you were in “Barrrrrttttthelona”.
Antarctica
The ice caps are melting, it will make you very sad. Also those cute penguins will be brutally mangled and eaten by seals. What's left of the ice caps will be stained red.
Brazil
The weather will remind you that you could have gone to a college where it's sunny and warm year round. Your (not-so) seasonal depression will get worse upon return to Pittsburgh, you have been warned.
Denmark
There are too many happy people in Denmark. CMU has asked students not to travel to Denmark, as they may experience joy, and not return back to campus.
Japan
You are not finding a waifu in Japan. Save yourself the money and spend it on therapy.
Scotland
Students going to Scotland over break are asked to please hide their school spirit. Students are warned that if they mispronounce Carnegie, a group of 30 buff kilted men will rip out their entrails.