Chemger Games winners threaten double suicide, sequels cancelled
It has been an action-packed day for the Chemger Games. Contestants from every corner of campus have embarked on the perilous journey to reach the Mellon Institute, with many dying from exhaustion before ever reaching the godforsaken building. Of those who remained, drama was omnipresent. Who could forget the unforgettable forced laser cutting perpetrated by the two members of the Donner house, or the various chemical burns perpetrated by Mudge? Certainly not the individuals from E Tower, who retaliated with an attempted poisoning with an unlabeled powder that ended up being table salt. But the most dramatic part was when two members of the same housing threatened a double suicide after being the only remaining survivors. This baffled officials, who quickly checked to reaffirm that there is indeed no rule against two winners being from the same housing. The two victors were promptly sent to CaPS, where they are under psychiatric evaluation.