by Rin Fair
This summer, the Japanese company behind one of the most popular videogames ever made partnered with San-Francisco-based developer Niantic to release a mobile platform that would take the world by storm. That’s right, Katamari Damacy Go is now live.
Everyone remembers Katamari Damacy, the 2004 hit in which players roll everyday objects into a giant ball in order to rebuild the moon and stars after they have been destroyed accidentally by the King of All Cosmos after a night of heavy drinking.
When the app is purchased, players are sent a “katamari,” a magical ball that allows anything smaller than itself to stick to it and make it grow in the original game. These special Katamari Damacy Go katamaris are equipped with a bluetooth chip that communicates to a phone how big they are at any given time. Players then wander around their houses, neighborhoods, and towns with this katamari. The app scans everyday objects and tells players if they are small enough to be rolled into the katamari. If they are, they can be picked up and stuck to the katamari, which is constantly secreting glue (since real magic is too expensive in the real world to be cost-effective).
Eventually, players are rolling their giant katamaris down the street, scanning neighbors’ mailboxes and hedges, to see if they are small enough to rip out of the ground and attach to the katamari. The top players in the world at this time have farm animals and small buildings in their katamaris, and we can’t wait to see where it goes next!
UPDATE: There have been reports of Katamari players being arrested simply for rolling their katamaris in public. We at readme are very disappointed in the police force for its clear discrimination against weeaboos. We advise players to be careful in their katamari-rolling as long as these silly complaints about people stealing cars for their katamaris keep coming in.
For our part, readme’s giant ball of junk is currently disguised as the AB Office.