Hidden Dangers at Activities Fair, First-Years are Warned

The fall activities fair, known locally as the “running of the organizations,” has come upon us. readme will be present alongside its parent organization, the Activities Board. Look to the bear hats, and the people acting like they don’t know the people in the bear hats.

While readme can assure you that none of its members bite (much), that cannot be said of all the organizations one can find on the CFA lawn. Frothing at the mouth, all manner of presidents, vice presidents, assistant vice presidents, co-vice presidents, secretaries, undersecretaries, treasurers, authorized signers, webmasters, librarians, and more will be competing for the greatest number of first-years.

Some tactics remain fairly orthodox: handing out candy, offering free samples of whatever wares they produce, playing videos showing the cool things that you could do if you join the club. However, in recent years, the methods have escalated. Now, club members prowl the lawn with tranquilizer darts, nets, and other nefarious means of capturing first-years and hauling them back to be indoctrinated.

So while you enjoy the day and the presentations, keep an eye out—you don’t want to find yourself tied to a chair in the basement of Stever, being forced to pledge allegiance to the KGB or recite pi to the hundredth digit by the Math Club.

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