readme Completely Unbiased

readme is dedicated not just to entertaining, but to also to drawing attention to societal wrongs and doling out criticism where it is due, regardless of party lines. Which it totally does. For reals.

“Sure, our last issue compared the GOP to the KKK,” said readme, “but it also included a cute story in which Obama is so charmingly naïve he thinks his eventual retirement will be as unexpected as the Pope’s!”

Acknowledging that people in both parties have room to improve, this year readme has been sure to choose such varied targets at the Catholic Church, Mitt Romney, the GOP, the Tea Party, and the Catholic Church.

readme added that it occasionally throws in a liberal-leaning article or two to make sure that Democrats and Green Partiers don’t feel they’re being disproportionately criticized.

“Is readme fair and balanced?” asked readme, “Does a bear shit in the woods? Is the Pope a symbol of out-dated prejudic– I mean, is the Pope Catholic?”

readme’s editor-in-chef said she works tirelessly to ensure that, no matter the political preferences of readme’s members, all sides get represented.

“We’re keep our own political opinions completely secret and, knowing that no policy is perfect, we actively seek targets on both sides of an issue. I don’t think anyone in club knows which president I voted for,” she said over a lunch of seitan and crunchy granola. “Well, I’d love to chat more, but I’ll be late to my engagement to another woman. Then I’m off to taxpayer-funded abortion training!”

“If the day comes when Obama does anything we can criticize, we’ll be on him!” She added, standing up to leave the table, “readme attacks hypocrisy wherever we see it.”

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