Blackboard Announces Scheduled Uptime


Considering the recent epidemic of unannounced downtime, Blackboard has announced scheduled uptime from 5AM-6AM Sunday morning. “It just makes sense,” Martha Warren, Blackboard’s PR rep, “to announce uptime instead of downtime since uptime is a rarer time than not. And we want to make sure that the students have time to get their work done.”

While most students are less than pleased with the scheduled timeframe, they are happy to know when and for how long Blackboard will be up. In fact many students are setting up camp near the routers on campus to make sure that the second Blackboard comes up, they will be ready to download or upload their assignments.

Katie Mooten, a junior mechanical engineer, has been eagerly awaiting the return of Blackboard for two weeks. She told readme over her hot plate of ramen, “Times are rough, there used to be an abundance of blackboard, but in this economy, we take what we can get. I hear tell that some of the routers are dried up. We gotta keep moving.”

Students all across campus are being hit hard during this dry spell. All over the campus, caravans of students can be seen, lugging their computers, desperate for a connection to Blackboard.

Though there is no sign of when this madness will end, students remain tentatively hopeful, always looking for announced uptimes, and for assignment extensions that will never come.

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